You know you are a net junkie when....

1. You wake up at 3 a.m. to go to the bathroom and stop to check your
email on the way back to bed.

2. You get a tattoo that reads "This body best viewed with Netscape
Navigator 3.0 or higher."

3. You name your child Dotcom.

4. You turn off your modem and get this awful empty feeling, like you just
pulled the plug on a loved one.

5. You spend half of the plane trip with your laptop on your lap...and
your child in the overhead department.

6. You decide to stay in college for an aditional year or two, just for
the free Internet access.

7. You laugh at people with 28.8K modems.

8. You start using smileys in your email mail. :-)

9. Your hard drive crashes. You haven't logged in for two hours. You
start to twitch. You pick up the phone and manually dial your ISP's access
number. You try to hum to communicate with their modems....and succeed.

10. You find yourself typing "com" after every period when using a word
processor.com

11. You refer to going to the bathroom as "downloading."

12. You start introducing yourself as "John Smith at Hotmail dot Com."

13. All your friends have an @ in their names.

14. Your cat has its own home page.

15. You can't call your mother....she doesn't have a modem.

16. You check your email...It says "no new messages". You check it again.

17. Your phone bill comes to your doorstep in a box.

18. You don't know what sex three of your closest friends are, because
they havve neutral nicknames and you never bothered to ask.

19. You move into a new house and decide to Netscape before you landscape.

20. You tell the cab driver you live at "http://1000.edison.garden/house/brick.html."

21. You start tilting your head sideways to smile.